Thursday, June 26, 2008

Another Worm in the Bucket!

They told us that a transplant would come with its own bucket of worms and so far they sure have been right. We've had another added today. It is called Avascular Necrosis. It means that the head of Jared's femur bones are decaying and this causes major problems with the hips. I think that we have been very blessed to have found it already. We did a pelvic x-ray 10 days ago to check his bowels. Everything there looked fine but they discovered this new problem. I read up on it and it sounds like it does affect kids with chronic kidney disease more often because of all of the imbalances of the calcium, vitamin D and other minerals that come with poor kidney function. It sounds like it is often found after the disease has progressed quite far, so I am feeling grateful that we have found it now. I am thinking that we have had a little miracle of our own and that maybe this diarrhea thing needed to happen so that we could discover this new problem before it progressed too far. We have an appt. to see the orthopedic surgeon in a couple of weeks to see what needs to be done. It sounds like it will most likely require surgery. Jared has had such a difficult time learning to walk and has such poor balance and I am starting to wonder if this hip problem could be part of that. Poor Jared, it is just one thing after another in his short little life. He is one tough little cookie though and has a smile no matter what comes his way. It still amazes me how if one little thing in your body is not working right, how it affects so many other things. The human body is truly remarkable!

Monday, June 23, 2008

Kidney Disease/Transplant Funnies

Sometimes what seems like rare experiences for some are normal for those of us with sick kids. Here is our latest example.

Jared had a pretty good night last night. He stirred briefly at 6 AM and had a bout of diarrhea and then he slept for another 45 mins. At 7 AM as I was headed downstairs with him he started throwing up. It was a really good throw up. My shirt was soaked through, the rag that I had was soaked and there was still plenty on the floor to clean up. I quickly ran in and changed my shirt and then headed downstairs and got Jared cleaned up. This is a pretty normal routine around our house in the mornings and so it wasn't much of a big deal. When I got down stairs Jeff was there and this is the conversation that we then had....

Jeff: "Did Jared just throw up?"

Me: "Yes and it was a big one. My shirt was soaked through and there is still some on the floor to clean up."

Jeff: "Sorry."

Me: "I actually like the throw up from this new formula much better. It doesn't have curds and isn't as thick and smelly as the old one. It's just liquid and doesn't smell too bad."

Jeff: "That is a strange comment to make."

Me: "It is ?" Oh, I guess I just had to find the good in the experience. You know, glass half full."

Jeff: "It's still weird."

Only those who deal with vomit and poop on a constant, daily basis can truly appreciate the blessing of better vomit. This conversation kind of sums up my life. There are always good things to find and be grateful for, even if it is better throw-up! LOL!!!!!

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Jared is feeling better!

Jared is feeling soooo much better! Yeah! He has been hilarious the past two days. He has been scooting around again and asking us to walk him around. He is making a lot of messes and generally has a smile on his face all of the time. Last week he was still really struggling and still having 8+ stinky diapers a day. We did more tests on Monday and everything came back normal which is good and bad. On Wednesday they decided to put him on a new kind of formula called Peptamin Jr. It is a formula that is already partly digested and so easier on the digestive system. It seems to be helping and I am keeping my fingers crossed that this will be the answer. Hopefully we'll be able to keep him healthy for awhile. It has been so nice to see him feeling better again.

I have decided that I am not going to ever take Jared into a public pool. He got so sick from just a normal stomach bug, I can't imagine how sick he would be if he got Cryto. So I told Jeff that we need to start saving every penny we can so that we can build a pool of our own so that Jared can swim. What a fun thing that would be. Jared might be 2o before we can get it but we are sure going to try!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Who Am I?

I sometimes feel like I don't know who I am anymore. I know that I am Jeff's wife and that I am the mother of Tyler, Alyssa, and Jared, but who else am I? I love being a wife and mother but ever since Jared was born (actually even when I was pregnant), my life has literally revolved around him. When you have a chronically sick child it seems to take over your life. I wouldn't trade not having him for anything, but sometimes I feel like I don't know how to talk about anything that doesn't have to do with kidneys, transplants, g-tubes, doctors appts., tests, lab results, etc. I have somehow lost myself along the way. I know that I have grown so much and have become a different person from going through these experiences but I know that there is more. When I do have a few moments to myself I don't really know what to do or what I would like to do (besides sleep lol). How do I find my individuality when the demands placed upon me have truly taken over? I love being a mom. That is all that I have ever wanted to be, but is there more?

Monday, June 16, 2008

My New Bike

I bought myself a bike last week. I haven't had one since Jeff and I got married. That's been almost 13 years! I absolutely LOVE it! I haven't found a bike trailer that I can afford yet so a neighbor let me borrow hers until I can get my own. I loaded up Jared in the trailer, Tyler hopped on his bike and off we went! It has been wonderful to feel the wind against my face as I race across the ground and it is something that Tyler and I can do together. On Saturday we road for almost two hours. I have been a little sore but it has been worth it. Hopefully we'll get Alyssa up and riding soon so that we can all go together.

Jeff and Alyssa returned home from their trip late Saturday night. They had a marvelous time! They didn't stop the entire time. They were in the park until it closed every night and they rode Splash Mountain six times (that was Alyssa's favorite)! She is turning into our little thrill seeker and rode on every roller coaster that she was tall enough to go on. Jeff is exhausted. He carried her on his shoulders the entire time! I reminded him that she can walk on her own, but he said that they were able to get from ride to ride so much more quickly that way. He tried so hard to make this an awesome trip and he succeeded. She will definitely never forget her Daddy Daughter Date to Disney Land!

Saturday, June 14, 2008

A few pictures of the last few months.

Alyssa's choir concert. Boy can she play the air guitar!

Our Cabin at Camp Sunshine


Sunny, the Camp Sunshine Bear, with Alyssa, Jared and I.



Alyssa doing the camp sunshine dance.




Tyler, Alyssa, an old lady on the subway, My sister Erika and my nephew Benny.





We went to the Aquarium in Chicago on our trip. Jared LOVES fish. He could of sat there all day!






Cute Jared!







This is how Jared use to get around when he was fed continuously. We rigged up a box on wheels and an ace bandage around his waist and off he would go!
















Thursday, June 12, 2008

Sigh!

What do I write about? My life is plugging along at a relatively uneventful speed this week and I am feeling rather uninspired. I am so use to running around and trying to keep up with things that I don't really know what to do with myself when I am not running around. Oh, there are plenty of things that I could be doing. Laundry, cleaning, weeding, cooking, but I am truly unmotivated. Tyler has been extremely glum this week and so that always makes doing anything tricky. Jared is starting to do better and so I am not quite so stressed worrying about him.

Jeff and Alyssa are at Disneyland this week. Maybe that is why Tyler and I are so blue. They are at the happiest place on earth without us! Jeff has been dreaming for years of taking Alyssa to Disneyland for a once in a life time daddy daughter date. They are having a grand time and Alyssa is in the place that she loves most. I have been wishing that I could be a little fly on Jeff's shoulder so that I could see and hear everything. Alyssa definitely deserves this little alone time with her dad. She has been absolutely amazing handling everything as she is stuck between these two time consuming brothers of hers and I am glad that she is having some time by herself. I am sure that she will be giving us quite the run down of their adventures for quite some time. It will definitely be a trip that she will never forget. Sorry for this random post. I am tired and I guess a little blue myself. Life is definitely full of ups and downs and so we continue on.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Have and Have Nots

Tammy had this great post and it was so much fun to read and think about that I decided to join the fun. Sometimes, as a stay at home mom, I often feel like my life is rather unremarkable, but after reading through this list I remembered that I have had some fabulous experiences in my life. But, the truth is, is that I would never give up being a mom for anything. My children continue to teach me more than I could ever learn traveling the world or becoming famous. I love my life and I love my husband and children and they truly are the world to me!

200 Have and Have nots!

1. Touched an iceberg

2. Slept under the stars

3. Been a part of a hockey fight

4. Changed a baby's diaper

5. Watched a meteor shower

6. Given more than you can afford to charity

7. Swam with wild dolphins

8. Climbed a mountain

9. Held a tarantula

10. Said "I love you" and meant it

11. Bungee jumped

12. Visited Paris

13. Watched a lightning storm at sea

14. Stayed up all night long and watched the sun rise
(in high school I procrastinated reading a book for a book report. I Spent the night out on our deck reading Tess of the D'urbervilles. I remember watching the moon cross the sky. It was a beautiful night and I loved the book.)

15. Seen the Northern Lights

16. Gone to a huge sports game

17. Walked the stairs to the top of the Statue of Liberty

18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables

19. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope

20. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment

21. Had a pillow fight

22. Bet on a winning horse

23. Taken a sick day when you're not ill

24. Built a snow fort

25. Held a lamb

26. Gone skinny dipping
(How embarrassing!)

27. Taken an ice cold bath

28. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar

29. Seen a total eclipse

30. Ridden a roller coaster
(I LOVE roller coasters!)

31. Hit a home run

32. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking

33. Adopted an accent for fun

34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors

35. Felt very happy about your life, even for just a moment

36. Loved your job 90% of the time

37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied

38. Watched wild whales

39. Gone rock climbing

40. Gone on a midnight walk on the beach

41. Gone sky diving

42. Visited Ireland

43. Ever bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant

44. Visited India

45. Bench-pressed your own weight

46. Milked a cow

47. Alphabetized your personal files

48. Ever worn a superhero costume

49. Sung karaoke

50. Lounged around in bed all day
(Does ten weeks of bed rest count?)

51. Gone scuba diving

52. Kissed in the rain

53. Played in the mud
(I loved playing in mud puddles when I was growing up.)

54. Gone to a drive-in theater

55. Done something you should regret, but don't

56. Visited the Great Wall of China

57. Started a business
(Taught children's creative dance classes in my basement.)

58. Taken a martial arts class

59. Been in a movie

60. Gone without food for 3 days

61. Made cookies from scratch

62. Won first prize in a costume contest

63. Got flowers for no reason

64. Been in a combat zone

65. Spoken more than one language fluently

66. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone

67. Bounced a check

68. Read - and understood - your credit report

69. Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy

70. Found out something significant that your ancestors did

71. Called or written your Congress person

72. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over

73. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge

74. Helped an animal give birth

75. Been fired or laid off from a job

76. Won money

77. Broken a bone

78. Ridden a motorcycle
(Went on a date my freshman year at BYU. He took me on his motorcycle up the mountains. I didn't think that I would come back alive! I haven't been on one since.)

79. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100 mph

80. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon

81. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing

82. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days

83. Eaten sushi

84. Had your picture in the newspaper

85. Read The Bible cover to cover

86. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about

87. Gotten someone fired for their actions

88. Gone back to school

89. Changed your name

90. Caught a fly in the air with your bare hands

91. Eaten fried green tomatoes
(I tried making them once. They didn't turn out too well.)

92. Read The Iliad

93. Taught yourself an art from scratch

94. Killed and prepared an animal for eating

95. Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt

96. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language

97. Been elected to public office

98. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
(Performing as a member of the BYU Ballroom Dance Company all over the world was a dream come true!)

99. Had to put someone you love into hospice care

100. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you

101. Had a booth at a street fair

102. Dyed your hair

103. Been a DJ

104. Rocked a baby to sleep
(I think that rocking a baby to sleep is one of the highlights of motherhood!)

105. Ever dropped a cat from a high place to see if it really lands on all four

106. Raked your carpet

107. Brought out the best in people

108. Brought out the worst in people

109. Worn a mood ring

110. Ridden a horse
(I spent the first 7 years of my life living on a cattle ranch in southern Colorado. I loved riding my horse and helping my dad herd the cattle.)

111. Carved an animal from a piece of wood or bar of soap

112. Cooked a dish where four people asked for the recipe

113. Buried a child

114. Gone to a Broadway (or equivalent to your country) play
(I saw Les Miserable in London.)

115. Been inside the pyramids

116. Shot a basketball into a basket

117. Danced at a disco

118. Played in a band

119. Shot a bird

120. Gone to an arboretum

121. Tutored someone

122. Ridden a train

123. Brought an old fad back into style

124. Eaten caviar
(I wasn't that impressed.)

125. Let a salesman talk you into something you didn’t need

126. Ridden a giraffe or elephant

127. Published a book

128. Pieced a quilt

129. Lived in an historic place

130. Acted in a play or performed on a stage
(I love performing! I would rather dance for people than speak to them.)

131. Asked for a raise

132. Made a hole-in-one
(Does miniature golf count?)

133. Gone deep sea fishing

134. Gone roller skating

135. Run a marathon

136. Learned to surf

137. Invented something

138. Flown first class
(Once. Just this past month when we went to Wisconsin. We used Jeff's skymiles to fly there and our return tickets were in first class. I'm sure that everyone in first class loved to see us and our 3 kids take our seats!)

139. Spent the night in a 5-star luxury suite

140. Flown in a helicopter

141. Visited Africa

142. Sang a solo

143. Gone spelunking

144. Learned how to take a compliment

145. Written a love-story

146. Seen Michelangelo’s David

147. Had your portrait painted

148. Written a fan letter

149. Spent the night in something haunted

150. Owned a St. Bernard or Great Dane

151. Ran away
(I believe that I was about 8 or 9 years old and I ran away to the back corner of our back yard for a whole 1 hour!)

152. Learned to juggle

153. Been a boss

154. Sat on a jury

155. Lied about your weight

156. Gone on a diet

157. Found an arrowhead or a gold nugget

158. Written a poem

159. Carried your lunch in a lunchbox

160. Gotten food poisoning
(Jeff and I went to Puerto Vallarta on our honeymoon. I came home and immediately got so sick that Jeff had to take me to the E.R. I had Shigella. It was one NASTY bug. Of course, even though Jeff and I ate the exact same things, he didn't get it!)

161. Gone on a service, humanitarian or religious mission

162. Hiked the Grand Canyon

163. Sat on a park bench and fed the ducks

164. Gone to the opera

165. Gotten a letter from someone famous

166. Worn knickers

167. Ridden in a limousine

168. Attended the Olympics

169. Can hula or waltz
(I was a dance major and so I learned to hula in one of my classes. I am a ballroom dancer and the waltz is one of my favorite dances.)

170. Read a half dozen Nancy Drew or Hardy Boys books

171. Been stuck in an elevator

172. Had a revelatory dream

173. Thought you might crash in an airplane

174. Had a song dedicated to you on the radio or at a concert

175. Saved someone’s life

176. Eaten raw whale

177. Know how to tat, smock or do needlepoint

178. Laughed till your side hurt

179. Straddled the equator

180. Taken a photograph of something other than people that is worth framing

181. Gone to a Shakespeare Festival

182. Sent a message in a bottle

183. Spent the night in a hostel
(We spent several nights in hostels on our tour to Europe.)

184. Been a cashier
(Ross, Seven Peaks and Arctic Circle.)

185. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt

186. Joined a union

187. Donated blood or plasma
(My weight or health has always prevented me from donating.)

188. Built a campfire

189. Kept a blog
(I love blogging!)

190. Had hives
(I discovered a few years ago that I am allergic to sulfa drugs. It was not a pleasant experience. I didn't know that you could be so covered in hives!)

191. Worn custom made shoes or boots

192. Made a PowerPoint presentation

193. Taken a Hunter’s Safety Course

194. Served at a soup kitchen

195. Conquered the Rubik’s cube

196. Know CPR

197. Ridden in or owned a convertible
(A friend of mine in college had one.)

198. Found a long lost friend

199. Helped solve a crime

200. Responded to a NJP newsletter

*If you want to join the fun, simply copy and paste this list to your post. Bold the ones that apply to you. Have fun!

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Summer?

School is out. The kids are home. They should be outside playing in the sprinklers and having water fights, but instead they have been inside as we have watched it rain all week! The rain and the cool weather have been nice but we are all feeling a little stir crazy. I even had to turn the heater on a few times this week! I can't ever remember it being this unusually cool the first week of June. It is quite unusual for Utah, but I am enjoying it for as long as I can because I know that the heat will be here soon enough. I will however, enjoy sending the kids outside!

Jared is still struggling a bit. We are doing more tests on Monday so we will hopefully figure out what is going on. We've started up continuous feeds again in hopes that we can get his weight going back up. His favorite words right now are "ok" and "big truck", "big car", "big bubble", "big" anything. He still loves cars, fish, bubbles, trucks and now fire trucks are pretty cool too. It's fun to see his verbal skills developing!

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Sick Days

What a week it has been! Jared got sick again on Wednesday, I got sick on Thursday, Tyler got sick on Friday and Jeff got it on Sunday. So far Alyssa has been able to avoid it. Hopefully it will stay that way. It is one nasty stomach bug. I haven't been that sick for a long time. Jeff was out of town the night that I got it and I spent all night in the bathroom as everything came up from both ends! I was just praying that Jared would sleep because I didn't know how I would take care of him and me at the same time! Amazingly the night passed and 48 hours later I was pretty much back to normal. Tyler and Jeff are feeling better now also. Poor Jared is still struggling. I took him to clinic yesterday and he is down to 24 pounds! He is soooo skinny but we are really having a hard time keeping him on his full feeds since he got sick on May 2. He just hasn't been the same since then. We are putting him back on continuous feeds for the next few days to see if that will help. We are also running some stool tests to see if he might have C-diff or rotavirus. Hopefully we'll figure something out soon. We are also changing one of his anti-rejection meds to see if that will help his BK and EBV. We are discontinuing his CellCept and putting him on Leflunomide. Supposedly, this med has some anti-viral properties that are effective against BK and EBV. Hopefully we'll start seeing some improvement in his numbers in a couple of weeks. He also has a cough that has been bothering him for about a month now. It is worse at night and we can't figure out what is causing this so they want him to go see a pulmonologist. Poor Jared, he has really had a rough month. Hopefully we'll get him happier soon.

I haven't updated on Tyler for awhile. He is doing great! I think that we have finally found the right med and dose that is good for him and he really is doing better. He and Alyssa had to come with me to the hospital yesterday and it was a looooong day. We left at 8:30 and didn't leave the hospital until 3 pm. Two months ago he would have lost it with a day of waiting around like that but he did great yesterday. It is so wonderful having my Tyler back. He is still a little moody and thinks that he needs to be entertained all of the time but I think that this is normal behavior for his age. He hasn't had a really bad episode since the middle of April. I knew that if we were patient and had faith that we would find something that would help him. It was a long journey but he is so much better now. What a blessing he is in our lives. He is such a great big brother. Alyssa and Jared absolutely love him and he is very helpful (when he wants to be LOL). We are going to have one awesome summer!